Who Are You?: an amalgamation of genetic data synthesized in a cabbage patch called neuroses

Where Are You?: in front of my 450 mhz people pad where i look much wiser than the nomenclatured other

What Are You?: painfully clever

What do you make?: a damn fine mess of language

What do you love?: masturbation with and without genitalia

What do you hate?: mental stability

What do you listen to?: frogs and punk rock, beats big and taps slight, belle and sebastian; but only to experience their manufactured rush of sincerity tourism.

What do you watch?: legs and limbs flexing and retracting as they tease my eyes with viscious desire

What do you drink?: volvic

What do you smoke?: parked cars. women without hair. third rate indie rock. wiggers. dead animals along the roadway. new testament pedophiles. i pass them all by... without a worry.

What do you take?: your trust. a long nap every two moons. pills. my sweet time. books by the sackful.

What do you believe in?: the scarcity of committing to a futility of the sublime

When We Were 16

Where were you?: on a sportfield kicking your ass

What were you?: a solipsist

What did you wear?: nylon

What did you listen to?: talulah gosh and veronica lake. only without any hint of irony; damn liars they turned out to be.

What did you watch?: scrambled playboy broadcasts

What did you love?: my mother's lack of faith in bank deposits

What did you hate?: her insistence that my wallet wasn't a suitable alternative

What did you drink?: the very ferment of the liquor cabinet

What did you smoke?: your statuesque pose on the playing field

What did you take?: hardly enough mom, hardly enough

What did you want to be?: a hurricane

Who did you fight?: mr. romance and the laws of algebra

Who/What did you believe in?: chicken was an aphrodisiac; my girlfriend's mother; europe as the garden of my eden

Where did you go?: to my girlfriend's who never quite understood the hormones of poultry

What did you learn?: "damn, it feels good to be a gangsta!"